I AM so anxious that I am virtually catatonic.

We all know about the flight or fight reaction to a trauma, real or otherwise, but I become frozen with fear.

In the last year, I have experienced two life-changing events and I need to adjust, instead my mind is permanently on overdrive, and fearful thoughts are taking over.

It may well be a survival instinct, but it is ruining my life.

Oh by the way, I was going to keep these feelings to myself but blame my bleating on the shoulders of my exceptionally talented headline writer friend (see above) who said: "Oh just write about yourself and lets be honest, it is funny that you need Botox in your rear end because you will look like you are 90 before the year is out unless you do something about it, and by that I mean now."

"I know. I look hollow-eyed with worry. I am consumed. People keep telling me that I should be stressed about the house move, but that is the least of my worries. I am not even remotely anxious that the Teen, the Dog and I could end up in a trailer park for two months until we can move into the house."

"You need to sort it out Bate. It is clearly reactive anxiety and not clinical but I think you should get some help."

"I know, my colleague told me this morning that I had changed dramatically from when he first met me six years ago when apparently I was 'full of life' and 'quirky' now he says, I look 'drained' and then he told me his Grandma had a coat like mine."

My exceptionally, talented friend did not refute his claims and blabbed on and on and on about CBT, Beta Blockers and the GP.

So clearly looking like an old bid with terrible dress sense on top of sleepless nights, permanent fear and catatonia my distress has reached epic proportions. Wail

Even my Bold Broker can't help himself from piping up: "You just have to have a reality check. You don't know how lucky you are in so many ways and things can always be worse. Have you tried Bach Flower Remedies?"

AAAAGH